


Whisper It in My Ears (So I Can Yell It to the World)

by Gemini_Baby



Series: Dick & Dami Week [5]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman and Robin (Comics)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Damian Wayne Loves Dick Grayson, Dick Grayson is Damian Wayne's Parent, Father-Son Relationship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:49:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29985210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gemini_Baby/pseuds/Gemini_Baby
Summary: Five times Damian whispered, Baba. And one time Dick heard him.
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Damian Wayne
Series: Dick & Dami Week [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2198913
Comments: 10
Kudos: 132
Collections: Dick Grayson is Damian Wayne's Parent, DickAndDamiWeek2021





	Whisper It in My Ears (So I Can Yell It to the World)

**Author's Note:**

> Written using the prompt, "Damian calls Dick Baba" for the Dick and Damian Week 2021  
> Warning for the first part: mentions of TBI  
> Thank you Krys for the beta help <3
> 
> I hope you enjoy <3

1.

Dr Simon Hurt fires and the bullet goes straight to Grayson’s head.

It is...scary to witness it. It would have costed him life or almost life, if he had had that thought in his Grandfather’s vicinity,

Blood flies everywhere and Grayson leans forward.

That image haunts Damian.

Keeps playing in his head over and over again.

  
  
  


They are in the med bay.

Him and Grayson.

Grayson lies on the medical cot, bandages wrapped around his head.

Damian is afraid to even cover his hand with Damian’s own.

“Baba”, he whispers with worry.

_ “Baba” , _ he whispers into the cold stale air of the cave.

“Baba”, he whispers into the darkness of the cave.

  
  


2.

  
  
  
  


Damian sits on the grass. The breeze blows his hair. The air is cold. It sends a chill down his bones. He feels numb. At the same time, he is feeling too much. He stares blankly at the stone in front of him.

_ Richard Dick John Grayson _ , it reads.

_ Richard Dick John Grayson, _ it mocks.

_ It mocks! _

In a cruel way.

Not because it tells Damian that someone he loves so much — that his own life doesn’t matter — no longer walks the ground Damian sits on.

But because Damian  _ knows  _ that Richard’s body does not lie six feet under. He has a feeling. His heart does a certain thing whenever Richard is around. It does not do that right now, while Damian sits beside the supposed grave of Richard.

It mocks.

The game placed next to Damian’s own gravestone by Richard — when Damian had been dead — taunts him.

Damian hopes wherever Richard is, he is happy. That he is safe. That he is cared about.

“I hope you are okay, wherever you are. Because I know you are out there.” He tells as he sits there, knowing that Dick won’t hear it. Not because Richard is dead -Damian is of the belief dead people do hear things - but because Richard does  _ not  _ rest there. “I hope you are safe”.

He does not tell all this to the ground. He actually tells it to the air, hoping that it would carry the message to the person Damian cherishes the most.

“I hope you know that I love...”, and it is here where he stutters. When he shouldn’t. Because there is no doubt in his own mind that Damian  _ loves him. _ “I hope you know that I love you,  _ Baba”. _

The wind blows.

Damian wishes it carries his message to the person intended.

3.

Growing up Damian had seen many things. Had faced many things. He still sees and faces them.

Nothing matches the horror and the horrific realization of being helpless to the person they love, when they are thrashing in pain. When the tears escape, the eyes wet a person’s cheeks, and one has to give a second thought to extend the hand to wipe the tears because it might not be registered as a hand extended to comfort.

It might be misinterpreted as a hand coming down to hurt.

_ Hurting  _ Richard would be the last thing Damian would want to do. Hurting him more than he is already hurt...one has to be a monster to even want to do that.

Damian knows that he has been called  _ monster  _ and  _ heartless _ on several occasions before.

Maybe...maybe the others  _ are  _ right. They  _ have been _ right.

But hurting Richard is where Damian draws the line. 

Richard is thrashing. His hands and feet had to be cuffed earlier so he wouldn’t hurt himself. 

Fear gas overdose is never pretty and it hurts a lot. Grayson’s mask had broken during the fight and in order to keep Damian safe, he had jumped and clutched his once Robin closer while also being hit by a large amount of fear gas. Scarecrow tonight had gone creative and the gas was released from pores from the roof and the walls, like those showers with a lot of pressure.

Damian hates that Nightwing had saved him. Because it means that he had gotten hurt in the process. Richard getting hurt was  _ unacceptable _ . It appeared that getting  _ hurt _ was all that happened to Richard when around Damian.

After they managed to subdue him to administer the antidote, Damian was lurking not far away.

Later, when Nightwing had been giving the antidote and was high on drugs, Damian goes to his brother. Throws his arms around the neck of his brother and whispers one word against his neck. One word that is all love, feelings, emotions, compassion, adoration, he has for Richard.

Damian whispers “Baba” against Richard’s pulse and then feels that drugs have been taking effect. Richard passes out.

  
  
  


4.

Damian is busy sketching as he sits on the edge of his bed, leaning his back to the headboard. The sketchbook is placed on his knees which are propped up. He had assorted the pillows on both sides of his. His back and spine love to start aching at the most unexpected times.

But time stops for no one.

Damian just lies or sits frozen whenever that happens.

The time doesn't stop. The pain doesn't stop.

The entire world of Damian comes to a halt every time.

The outside world moves on. Damian stays behind.

He takes deep breaths. Tells himself it is not happening now. That the pain he feels every time might be inevitable, it doesn't mean what led to it is currently happening.

He turns his attention to the sketchbook and starts drawing on the paper.

Some form of calm which had settled earlier dissipates as loud voices and commotion coming from downstairs reaches Damian’s ears. The yelling is so loud that it reaches the third floor where Damian’s room is. The yelling gets louder and Damian’s heartbeat speeds up.

At first, he tries to zone out any noise but doesn’t succeed in doing so. Then, Damian settles on the alternative to listen but he also strains his ears to deduce who is yelling and what. The words and context are lost on him. They don’t reach him but the noise does. He is able to identify the owners of the voices and regrets it after a second he does that. The voices belong to none other than Father and Richard.

Memories and flashbacks of Mother and Grandfather fighting and yelling take him to another level of panic. He tries to blur out the noises now.

From two guardians of his fighting to the other two fighting now.

_ That’s just what Damian needs right now. _

He focuses on taking deep breaths. Tries to distract himself with anything that could help him keep the panic attack at bay.

Pennyworth should be downstairs, his mind supplies. Damian doesn’t know what to do of that information. It’s a good thing Stephanie and Cassandra are having a sleepover at Stephanie’s apartment and Timothy is out of the city with his friends.

And Todd is -

Wait. Todd was supposed to be at the manor today. None of the voices, which are getting louder and louder, belong to Todd. and that means that he would be deeply disturbed because of the fight, if not triggered. He might be hiding. Maybe under a table. Damian has stumbled upon him before once there. He did not like seeing his second eldest brother so afraid.

He hopes Jason is okay.

He drops a message. Then another. Then two more.

A few minutes later, he drops a few more.

Then -

Then he stops himself from sending more messages.

He hopes the fight and commotion is over soon. He wants to run and check if Richard and Father, both, are okay. But he knows he can’t. Not just because it brings memories, that he has tried so long to bury deep, he would rather not relive but also because he knows the moment he enters their peripheral, they will stop.

They would still have the anger and misunderstandings left but won’t be able to let it out. They need to vent and clash currently. So that the things don’t get over-brewed. That doesn’t mean he would stop worrying about them and be worried because of them.

  
  


There’s noise coming from outside of someone storming up the stairs. Richard enters his room, leans against the door as he closes it behind upon entering, and breaths.

Damian pats the space next to him. Richard closes the distance and climbs on the bed. He lies on his side, his back towards Damian. Damian adjusts the pillows behind himself and covers Dick with as many blankets as he can.

Damian’s knee brushes Richard’s back. Neither of them moves. Then Damian reaches out with a hand and rubs circles on his brother’s back.

His phone, on his other knee, vibrates, diverting his attention. His one hand keeps running the circle on his brother’s back and the other hand unlocks the phone and sees the messages.

They are from Todd, telling him that he is okay and that Damian takes care of himself. Damian replies with “I will, Mom” and puts the phone aside.

He brushes hair away from Richard’s forehead, who looks like he has fallen asleep.

Damian leans forward and kisses Richard’s forehead.

“Sleep well, Baba.”

  
  
  
  
  


5.

"I was too young back then", Richard says and all Damian hears is the ringing in his ears and the sound of his heart breaking. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


He won't whisper it anymore. He won't dare to bring it on his lips ever again. He is not the person Richard wants to hear it from. He will never be the person Richard would want to hear it from. 

_ I was too young back then.  _

Damian was not his son. Even though Richard would always be his father. 

  
  
  
  
  


The words for  _ Father  _ should be uttered by someone Richard wants to hear it from.

Damian is not that someone.

It won't be something that he would be happy to hear. It won't be a cause for happiness. It would be something leading to hurt and dread. The two feelings and emotions always associated with Damian. 

  
  
  
  


Robin sees Nightwing grappling away. He can see the flips. His brother has already covered some buildings' distance.

  
  
  
  
  
  


This time Damian dares for the last time.

“I hope you are happy,  _ Baba. _ ”

This time Damian does not want the wind to carry the words to Richard. This time, he wants them uttered and let out in a void. Lost in a void and not echoed back ever. Not echoed in the voice that belongs to Damian. Not echoing back in the voice of the person whom Richard would not want to hear it from. 

Richard would not want to hear the word  _ Baba anyway. Not from his kids. _

He would want to hear tati or Dad from his children.

Damian should stop poking his nose where it doesn’t belong, for once, and let others live. His brain screams at him. Damian hates that he agrees to what his stupid brain said.

  
  
  


He leaves for Gotham and swings back to the manor.

It is raining.

His cheeks are wet.

+1.

The past couple of years have been wild. Not that they usually aren’t. But the last two years? Even Damian would want a refund.

They finally managed to schedule some time to spend it together in each other’s company.

Damian was glad to spend time with his brother.

He really didn’t care about the movie that played on the screen.

His attention was only on the head in his lap, his brother’s hair tickling him as he rested his head upon where Damian’s legs had crossed, and Damian’s own fingers alternating between scratching Richard’s scalp, brushing through his hair or gently massaging his temples.

Damian’s fingers were massaging the temples when Richard’shand came over them, covering and cupping it.

The voice of the TV blares in the background. Richard tilts his head and looks up at Damian. His dimpled smile giving all the love and affection and mischievousness he felt.

Damian leaned down and Richard leaned up a bit, and booped their noses. A smile spreads across his brother’s face and warmth blooms in Damian’s chest.

It has been so long since he saw his older brother smile.

Then, Richard diverts his attention to the movie and Damian finds himself zoning out. The bird on the windowsill looks so lively. And the tree near the window is very green. Roses bloom outside in the garden.

He is busy looking at the outside when the hair tickles his lap more than before, he is taken off guard.

He turns his face to the room, away from the room and looks down. Richard is...not quite thrashing. But, it seems like he is trying to find a way to curl up.

Damian lifts his head and stares at the screen. The content playing gives him a vague idea what caused the current distress. Then, Damian reaches for the remote and turns the tv off.

Damian doesn’t much remember what happens afterwards, except that they both were hugging and Damian had been trying to talk with Richard. Damian is squeezing the bigger body as best as he can.

Richard’s breaths come quick and Damian rubs his back in circles, nuzzles his hair.

Kissing the crown of Richard’s hair, he whispers “Baba”.

That seems to pull out Richard from whatever that had been haunting him.

Richard blinks at him and stares. Damian takes that moment to fill a glass of water with a jug placed nearby. He offers the glass to his brother who is ready to gulp down big sips but at the last moment, stops himself and takes small sips instead.

Putting the glass aside after finishing its contents, Richard leans back. “What did you call me, Dami?”

“Baba, Damian whispered in reply. His voice so low he didn’t know if anyone heard it.

“Does that mean-”

“Yes!”

Then before Damian knows it, Richard is throwing his body and draping himself all over Damian, hugging and squeezing him. Damian hugs and squeezes back.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it 💖
> 
> Kudos, comments, bookmarks, user subscriptions are all welcome and appreciated
> 
> If you want to say hi on tumblr or follow me there, I am geminibabyhere


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